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Enjoy The Season But Don’t Breathe Deeply


What is more wonderful than a beautiful fall day with clear skies and lower temperatures? I can tell you exactly what’s more wonderful – no pollen!
Pardon me if I sound crabby. I am. I was blindsided by the allergy attack from hell a week ago. (I think it was a week ago . . . is it still October?) One day I was fine, the next day I was coughing, choking and sounded like I had either tuberculosis or whooping cough. Or maybe just a really bad hairball.
It hit my husband too. We survived the weekend and saw the doctor Monday. Those of you who know me know I rarely go to the doctor, so when I show up in his office, I think he knows I’m at death’s door or at least feel like I am.
Apparently allergies, hay fever and similar problems are popping up all over the mainland area. I can’t help wondering if Hurricane Harvey contributed in some way. We might as well blame Harvey for this problem. The storm is being blamed for everything else.
The worst part about allergies is that there really isn’t much to do for them except treat the symptoms and ride then out. Try telling that to those of us who are suffering, though. I coughed so hard my sides ached for days. I even woke myself up at night by coughing.
And did I mention the wheezing? This really complicates things because now you can’t breath through your mouth or bronchial tubes. It’s exhausting and tends to drown out the TV. Heaven forbid you have to answer the phone. Honking geese sound better than that.
Even though allergies aren’t contagious, you can’t go anywhere. You sound like Typhoid Mary. You’ll scare everyone in the grocery store. At least folks at the drug store are used to it by now. This might be a good time to think of investing in a company that makes a popular allergy medication. Just ask at the drug counter what’s selling the best right now.
Well, I feel a little better. Venting must be good for sick people. That’s probably why I love writing a column. It’s so much cheaper than therapy. Meanwhile, since I haven’t been up and around or out and about much lately, I do have one tidbit to share with you.
Some of you may remember me mentioning a few times that I never fail to be amazed at some of the idiotic ideas are shared by readers of the Hints From Heloise column. I don’t have a problem with Heloise. It’s just people who write in with really pointless ideas for how to do something “more efficiently.”
The problem is twofold. Their ideas are NOT more efficient, and they’re solving problems that really don’t matter, except to them.
Here my favorite most recent one. A reader said he/she had problems keeping track of how many times they had used the razor in the shower. The solution? The reader took an old “toe separator” that had been used for pedicures & started putting the razor in the hole on one side, then moved it to the next hole after each use.
I hope this brilliant and amazing bit of ingenuity wasn’t too overwhelming for you.
What is this person thinking about the rest of the time? Arranging their shoes in alphabetical order? Pinning their socks together before washing so they won’t get separated? Excuse me . . . I think I need to go get some rest. My allergies are making things like that get on my nerves.

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