FOOD ONLY FOODIES COULD LOVE

Let me say right from the first, I am not a foodie. I’ve only twice had the experience of eating at a foodie type restaurant. This is the kind of place where they specialize in finding strange ways to prepare stranger foods. One of those times was particularly disappointing because the restaurant is a very popular and well-known New Orleans restaurant. I remember years ago eating there and loving the delicious food. So a few years ago when someone suggested we go there, I thought, “Great idea!” One look at the menu changed my mind immediately. The featured dishes weren’t all that bad but the way they were prepared was to my mind totally awful. This restaurant offered a reasonably extensive menu but after consulting it three times, I couldn’t find anything I would even consider eating. (But the dessert was wonderful. You just have to look for the silver lining in these situations.) I was reminded of this meal recently when I saw a list of top restaurants in the Houston area. I guess it depends on what you consider tasty eating. I thought I would share a few of my picks for my “Worst Cooking Ideas EVER!” list. First, there was the restaurant that specialized in wild game. This is not something I eat – ever! It’s “gamey tasting.” Here are a few items on the menu: venison tartare, elk chop with horseradish beets and charred endive, and the worst of all: chicken- fried venison. I didn’t see road kill mentioned, thank goodness! Another restaurant considered trendy beat the above menu by a mile. Let me just list a couple of items offered here, and you be the judge. Duck confit and poached duck egg over smoked bacon and onion, or suckling pig with apple purée. Seriously? And while I love Mexican food (both Tex-Mex and authentic dishes from Mexico), I draw the line at cabrito of pulled roasted goat with roasted cactus pads. A perfect example of “just because you CAN do something doesn’t mean you should.” But you know how I like to save the best – or in this case the worst – for last. The hands-down winner is Negro en Negro, (Tejas Heritage Farm black-footed chicken, mole negro and creamy corn meloso). This may not sound all that bad. I personally like mole. But you have to picture what this dish looks like. Visualize a piece of chicken. But wait – there’s more! Propped up gracefully against the chicken is a lovely grilled CHICKEN CLAW. Complete with toenails. That’s right. A genuine black-footed chicken’s claw reaching up, looking like something straight off the cover of a Stephen King horror novel. You can’t help but imagine it springing off the plate to grab your throat. Am I making this up? Trust me, I don’t have that much imagination. Bon appetit! Photo Sources: Pinterest and Twitter