By Brenda Groves
The Post Newspaper Contributing Writer
When I was growing up our family loved to watch old movies. From musicals and comedies to great epics like Giant and my moms favorite, Gone With The Wind. I remember going to see this movie on the big screen as a little child.
And the character of Scarlett O’Hara seemed truly larger than life in my mind. I have mentioned this to you before but I really wanted to be like her in many ways but mainly have her strong spirit! ( I certainly wasn’t going to be like Melanie whom I thought of as basically a doormat! Weak! Naive! Kind, but to a fault. She didn’t have a clue!)
So, like Scarlett, in my mind I began to take all the burdens of the world onto my shoulder and to fight!! I took up all kinds of causes, I was so outspoken, very opinionated and I was not intimidated by any man! I liked them but they were NOT going to rule over me!!!
Of course society influenced and encouraged me because after all, “I am woman , hear me roar!!” and for many years I adopted this philosophy.
I liked men but marriage didn’t appeal to me much, I didn’t want any man to “tell ME what to do!!!” But, I did marry a wonderful man in 1986. We started a family but in my heart there was still an ongoing “battle of the sexes” raging in our home and marriage.
A constant struggle for domination because I was so determined to make sure MY rights weren’t violated from the “Scarlet” code I lived by which was basically, “me, myself and I!”
Then I met another Man, my Lord Jesus Christ, and I began to read my Bible. He showed me who I was really rebelling against. It wasn’t my husband, it wasn’t for equal rights, it wasn’t for the right to abort a human life and countless other “causes.”
No, with great sorrow I realized that my heart was in rebellion/opposition against God and His Holiness! The very Word of God. His heart and goodness and the beautiful plan for women. (To be cherished and loved like Christ loved and cherishes the church/His body.)
To be free from living my life independent from God and to be transformed in my spirit back into the image of who I was created to look like in the first place. A beautiful bride. To reflect His heart and image and guess what, I began to blossom inside. And this is my testimony, joy unspeakable flooded my heart as I began to see my true identity in Christ and God’s order for things in my life and home. I no longer felt threatened, insecure and afraid that my rights were going to be violated if I yielded “my position” to my husband. We stopped competing against each other!
Ladies, please do not be afraid of the Bible … though it will set us back in time … in your own heart … back before the fall of man, back before we became separated from God and began reflecting the image of the destroyer of mankind, the true enemy, the father of all lies- satan.
Where there is strife and confusion there is every evil work! The attack is on the Covenant of marriage between man and wife. (And the honor given to women to be the holding vessels to nourish and protect the human life that He created.)
Oh, I still fight! The good fight of faith, in the right for unborn life (the right for every woman to be born), the sanctity of marriage between a man and a woman!
But I’m not going to yell and scream. I’m not going to carry a picket sign. I am going to share the Gospel, the real power and strength, the word of God!
The love of Jesus will compel us to go forward. He came to restore us. Spirit, soul and body.
Hear Him roar! He will fight your battles. He will lift your burdens onto His shoulders!
Now, I love and respect my husband in reverence/love/respect for Christ.
For I died but now I am born again and my rebellious heart is … gone with the wind.
In retrospect, I now identify with the character of Melanie in GWTW. Because I have a testimony …. “When I am weak in Christ, then I am strong.” “For I do not wrestle against flesh and blood.” And this scripture has healed many marriages … “Wives, likewise, be submissive (yielding) to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word (preaching/scolding/correcting/criticizing) , may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear (respect/reverence/love for Christ). Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible (never fades/dies/changes) beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” 1 Peter 3:1-4 (Parenthesis mine.)
Contact Brenda Groves at: bkgroves1996@yahoo.com
