By Brenda Groves
The Post Newspaper Contributing Writer
“Brenda, you know I love you, but you’re fat.”
This was not exactly what I wanted to hear as I pulled a fresh batch of brownies from the oven. But my sister was right. I knew I was overweight, and had been, off and on, for most of my life.
And I might have taken offense except she quickly followed with this declaration:
“But so am I, so I have signed us up for Weight Watchers and you will meet me at the track every day to start walking. Together we ARE going to lose this weight and get healthy!!”
Yep, I knew I was fat and by that time (I was in my mid-30s), I had settled in my heart and accepted that I was destined to be overweight. It was even suggested to me before that God had made me this way. After all, God is sovereign, right? We have absolutely no responsibility or power to govern ourselves. It’s all by design, and everything happens for a reason.
Well, I totally disagree with that doctrine and it is completely contrary to the word of God.
But science also jumped in on my side, it was my gene pool, my genetic makeup was causing me to be fat.
Next came the suggestive thought, “so stop fighting it and just give in.”
Oh, cool! There was a spiritual excuse and medical diagnosis. I felt better already. My conscious was soothed at the way I was mistreating the body that God had given me. And I was taking food, something that was good, needful and natural, and using it in an abusive way.
“Yeah, I’m just a big-boned, healthy country girl!” Lol! (I remember once when a doctor suggested I lose 50 pounds and I gave the “big boned” theory. She started laughing! “What? Who told you that? You actually have a petite frame.”).
You know, ironically, I didn’t start out this way. I was born six weeks premature and weighed just 4 lbs., yet even my earliest memories I can recall never feeling full. I could eat so much for my size. I saw a few early photos and I was thin to normal. Around six, though. the pudginess was beginning to show.
Yes, I was made fun of, teased and always self-conscious about my weight. I started thinking like a fat person and making fat jokes about myself before anyone else could.
And I’m not telling you this to get sympathy.
I have had a tendency to gain weight. But instead of resisting this tendency, I indulged it. I BECAME fat because I ate too much! Pretty simple.
Then as a teenager, it was suggested that I had an addictive personality with no self-control (More excuses for future bad choices.).
I agree with part of that statement. I had not learned to control myself in this area. My body could not become fat without my hands shoveling the food into my mouth. But my personality was developed as a result of my upbringing/past experiences/lack of self-discipline.
Everyone has tendencies towards doing things that are harmful to them in some way.
It has been scientifically proven that we can actually change our brain chemistry as a result of how we think and subsequently our repeated actions. “How a man thinks in His heart so is he.” Proverbs 23:7.
Here’s my point.
If those lies spoken to me, about me and from my own lips would have been true, that God had made me this way, or that I was genetically wired for obesity, then how did I lose 28 lbs. in three months? The answer is, it wasn’t God’s design for my life. And I could do something about it.
I took a leap of faith and through resisting the temptation to eat more than I needed and by physical exercise, and by exercising self-control, I was able to lose weight.
Years later, the Lord took it a step further, as I submitted fully to Him and as I began resisting the devil, I gained the knowledge of how to fill up on His love and attention and found comfort in His Holy Spirit. Instead of food, I was allowing Him to take the place of overeating.
Now, when I begin to gain weight, I know I am lacking spiritual food (the word of God) and using food as a substitute again. So, I ask Jesus to help me to get back on track with Him. And I exercise my faith in this area. But I no longer identify with being a fat person. My identity is in Christ.
It is true I was born white in skin color. It is true I am of Scottish decent. It is true I was born a female.
And these truths WILL never change. No matter how I think, FEEL or is suggested otherwise.
On this note, a person is born male or female. Our sexual orientation is established at birth. Now if our minds are polluted with perverted thoughts/beliefs/experiences, and even if we have desires contrary to how God created us, that does not equal truth.
And I will not call anyone names or love them less or have any less respect for them than any other person as we are all created by God. But I will not agree with the theology of transgenderism, or any other sexual deviation from the awesome plan God has for our lives. There are many testimonies of people who have been delivered from lifestyle choices and are now happily married to the opposite sex.
Just like God did not plan for me to abuse something He created to sustain my life, not to take it, neither did He plan for any of us to sexually mutilate our bodies or perversely re-create them.
I know some people don’t like to hear this, and I am not saying this to be cruel, I am saying this in love.
You know, my sister did not condemn me, instead she loved me enough to expose a lie, tell me the truth and offer help.
Jesus came in grace and truth. We have free will to accept His grace AND truth or reject them.
“Have I therefore become your enemy because I tell you the truth?” Gal. 4:16
PS: The Bible says that we can sear our conscious with a hot iron, so that over a period of time it gets easier and easier to give in to our fleshly desires. But praise God, this is also reversible, if we repent (change our minds) “submit/yield to God/His word/love/truth, resist the devil, and he will flee from us.” James 4:7
