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WORDS OF WISDOM FROM LOU RINGER AND JACK CROSS

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WE ALL GET OLD IN THE END….
I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out
of the way much faster now.
Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers.
Now they drink like their fathers.
You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really
like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.
I didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes five years
in a row.
I decided to stop calling the bathroom the “John” and renamed
it the “Jim”. I feel so much better saying I went to
the Jim this morning.
Old age is coming at a really bad time. When I was a
child I thought “Nap Time” was a punishment. Now, as a
grownup, it feels like a small vacation.
The biggest lie I tell myself is….”I don’t need to write that
down, I’ll remember it.”
I don’t have gray hair; I have “wisdom highlights”! I’m just
very wise.
If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would’ve put them
on my knees.
Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We
haven’t met yet..
Of course I talk to myself; sometimes I need expert advice.
At my age “Getting lucky” means walking into a room and
remembering what I came in there for.
Actually I’m not complaining because I am a Senager
(Senior teenager). I have everything that I wanted as a
teenager, only 60 years later. I don’t have to go to school
or work. I get an allowance every month. I have my own
pad. I don’t have a curfew. I have a driver’s license and
my own car. The people I hang around with are not scared
of getting pregnant. And I don’t have acne‚Ķlife is great!

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