THE GIVE AND THE TAKE

Manipulation can’t wait to get. Love can’t wait to give.
So many people have a lifetime of experiences of
what they believe is love. But how can they know different
if they have only experienced one type of love.
Or should I say what they think is love. The bible tells
us what love is. Love is patient, love is kind. It does
not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not
dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily
angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. This scripture,
1 Corinthians 13:4-5 is saying that love is a choice,
we have free will to choose who we will love and
this is the footprint that shows us how to love each
other. So many hurt people continue to hurt people
because they have not experienced true love. They
have probably been abused and misused by those
closest to them.
People they would have entrusted with their lives.
Our God is a relational God. His motivation is relationship.
Because we are created in His likeness, we
too are relational. The enemy will try to lie to us and
tell us that we are loners and we don’t need other
people, but that is far from the truth. Literally, our
well-being depends on a good, solid relationship with
Jesus and other people. People who treat us with dignity
and respect. It is also our duty to show the kind
of love mentioned above to others, no matter how
they treat us. Forgiveness plays a huge role in loving
another person. How can you show genuine love toward
someone that you have not forgiven? You can’t.
The decision to love them will be overshadowed by
the thoughts that remind you of what they did to you.
Manipulation can’t wait to get. Love can’t wait to give.
Choosing to love your spouse, neighbor, parent, sibling,
or friend is one that you will have to continue to
choose. In that choice you are choosing to be selfless
instead of being self-seeking. Because if we
could do it our way, everything would be all about
ourselves. But being bold enough to choose to love
them despite what they have done to you or despite
what they are still doing to you is one that will bring
you inner-peace.
This doesn’t mean for you to stay in an abusive relationship.
By all means, do not stay with someone
who is verbally or physically abusing you. Forgive
them, but move on from them. Pray for them, bless
them and continue to love them but do not accept
that type of treatment. In John 15:12 we see a commandment
to Love each other as I have loved you.
Which means to take on the attitude of love in your
daily life walk. Take on the attitude of kindness, gentleness,
meekness, be humble and patient with one
another. If you see an area of life that your neighbor is
tumbling with and you have overcome it in your own
life-guide them, help them, show them the better way.
Life can throw us many curveballs consisting of
things and events we were not expecting to take
place. It is our consistent decision to love despite
what we go through that allows us to grow through.
When we stay stuck in the pattern of manipulation,
wanting to receive, receive, and receive in any way
we can that causes a cycle to start that ends in destruction.
When we choose to treat people well, and
love despite our feelings we see things in a different
light, we have a unique perspective on how to handle
situations and we have a trait that is attractive to likeminded
people and it results in healthy relationships,
vibrant friendships, and lifelong bonds that can never
be broken. Examine your own heart today, and ask
God to fix any place that is bruised or broken and to
replace it with His love so that you are able to give
that same kind of love to other people. Remember,
manipulation can’t wait to get, love can’t wait to give.
Which will you choose? Xo-Shelle Amey