By Brenda Groves
The Post Newspaper Contributing Writer
Back in 1996, a man came into the insurance office that I was working at, as he was supposed to meet up with one of our agents.
As he waited, we began to visit a bit, and pretty soon the conversation turned to God. It turned out this man was a born-again Christian and it was a Divine appointment.
Well, at that time I did not know God. Like many people, I knew some things about Him. Or I thought I did anyway.
Over the first 33 years of my life, I had caught glimpses of His character. These perceptions were gleaned from church, friends, relatives, movies, old wives’ tales and my own experiences. Actually, I had very little sound Biblical truth in my life.
So I knew a little about God, but I did not know Him. I believed that He existed, but was very distant from me. It seemed far reaching that I could have intimacy with Him. That was not the impression I had received from others who had claimed to have a relationship with God.
Well, the visitor and I chatted a while longer as I proudly puffed away on my cigarette, daring him to condemn me for it as one of the “big sins.”
You know the “big sins:”, drinking, smoking, adultery, fornication, drugs, etc. That’s what I was taught, those are the “biggies” that would earn you a ticket straight to hell.
At one point in our conversation, the man presented this question: ”Brenda, do you think you are going to heaven?”
I recalled taking a long drag on my cigarette as I reflected on that question.
Let’s see, I have done MANY bad things, but, all in all, I’m a pretty good person. I have done LOTS of good things too. Besides, I can think of lots of people who are way worse than I am.
After all, I believe in God, so that counts for something. I honor God by going to church at Christmas and Easter (most years). I’m kind to the elderly. I love animals and tenderly care for them. I love my family and most people (the ones who are nice to me, that is).
And I always put some change in the Salvation Army buckets at Christmas. My good should have far outweighed the bad things I have done.
So, I exhaled a large cloud of smoke and replied, “Yeah, I think I’ll go to heaven. I’m basically a good person. I know lots of people who are way worse than I am.”
An expression of genuine kindness (not pity/superiority or judgment) crossed this man’s face and he softly posed another question.
He simply said, “What about Jesus?”
I sharply retorted, “What about Him?”
His next question, spoken again with all compassion and respect. stopped me in my tracks.“How do you measure up to Jesus?”
Baffled, I remember thinking, “Gee, why didn’t you bring up Mother Teresa. I might have a chance with her.”
But Jesus!!!!
At that moment, all my pride and self-righteousness deflated like a sad balloon. With downcast eyes I stuttered, “Well, I…I don’t measure up. I mean…He’s perfect.”
With unconditional love on his face, the man said, “Well, according to the Bible, that is the stature we must attain. The Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of God.”
That was the worst moment of my life, because for the first time, in a long time, I had to consider the truth: that I did not know God, or Jesus, and because of that, I was going to hell.
I was raised with the belief that there is a heaven and a hell, and as a child I had this intuitive knowledge in my heart. But over time, I had allowed truths to be replaced with complacency, and lies from the devil.
I was a good person, but who wants to be the best sinner that goes to hell?
Come to find out, it isn’t the individual sins that condemns us in this time of grace. It is the rejection of the One who paid for the “sin” of the world. We are born with a sin nature and God is a Holy God, so “… that no flesh should glory in His presence.” 1 Cor. 1:29
All of our good works does not make us right with God, but putting faith in Jesus, the sinless Son of God who paid for our sins and took on our unrighteousness so we can have the right to stand with God. This relationship will reproduce good works to His glory, not our own. His testimony of the living God, living through us.
Well, a short time after that glorious encounter, I humbled myself, got down on my knees in my living room and called out to Jesus with all of my heart with this simple request. “God, I want to know You. Jesus, I am not moving one step until I talk to you.”
He answered, and suddenly I felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders, then waves of pure love, peace, forgiveness and mercy washed through me.
With joy and surprise, I opened my eyes from that simple prayer and exhaled, “God! You are real! Jesus YOU’RE ALIVE!!”
At the age of 33, I was born again. No longer separated from God in my spirit. Now we are One!
I guess you could say that I was basically a good person, but now I am the redeemed child of the Lord. A blood bought child of God. Fully accepted in His kingdom. His beloved child. My name is written in heaven.
You know, I didn’t catch the name of that man who came to my office that day. I don’t even recall what he looked like in detail.
But, one day I will see him again, and thank him for taking the time to boldly speak the truth in love to a dead person, full of pride and devoid of life. For this I am eternally grateful. Contact Brenda Groves at: bkgroves1996@yahoo.com
