By Dorothy Meindok
The Post Newspaper Veterans Consultant
This week, I am writing about my mom, Nora LaVerne Cumbest Reyes Meindok. There is so much to say about this incredible woman. She grew up in the Magnolia District of Houston being born there in a three-room “shotgun” shack that still stands today with a view of the glorious Port of Houston. Nora is resilient and the true definition of “where there is a will, there is a way.” She taught me that through example.
Her mother was murdered when she was very young, and with her father at sea, she was left in the care of her stepmother. According to her and many others, this was a difficult existence that she couldn’t escape from as a child, so like the rest of her siblings and childhood friends, they made the best of their lot in life. She was often bullied and beaten up by individuals in her high school that were confused by her Filipina skin color and the fact that she did not speak Spanish, accusing her of being ashamed of her lineage and wanting to be “white.” She reports it was confusing for her and she felt she had to hide her mother’s lineage as a Southern white woman from Mississippi who had gone against the grain in the name of love marrying a “chocolate” sailor as bullets flew as they left the driveway. It was quite an issue in the 1930’s no matter which side of the “colored” fence one was from. Mom says neither side really liked any of them, which is how Cher and her song “Halfbreed” was originally played in our household as I grew up, eventually mostly by me belting it out with pop-gun revolvers, KISS T-shirts and boots (cowboy, Go-Go or motorcycle). I think I actually broke the record, lol. Yet, she didn’t let it all get her down and is a fierce Milby High School Buffalo.
As soon as she was able, her life took her to New Orleans, where I was born. She quit high school with just a credit left but seized her opportunity to break generational cycles and grab autonomy. Upon meeting my father, her life changed and she found herself sailing the world on a cargo ship as an Officer’s wife. My sister wasn’t school aged yet so she went along, and they lived traveling Africa and elsewhere until they were kicked off the ship because my mom was eight months pregnant with me and about to bust. It was a safety issue that could not be ignored.
Our life was quite lovely and filled with hope, inspiration and love. For the first time, all of my mother’s needs were met, allowing her to be the very best version of my mom by her own admission. My father’s death hit hard and was unexpected. Again, she found herself alone but this time with two children in tow. Offers were made to raise her children in quite lavish homes, relieving her of the hard duties of being a single mother in the 1970’s. Racist and political nonsense left her without even survivor’s benefits from the Social Security Administration, for any of us. Yet, she overcame.
My mother used to have three shirts she wore over and over again, tattered and torn and mended over and over again. I wanted to simply buy her a nice shirt and decent non-polyester pants. I knew my father would want more for her. She delivered it herself working & retiring from Southwestern Bell and the resulting AT&T. A devout union supporter and representative of CWA Local #6222, she walked picket lines and peacefully protested all kinds of contract issues.
She has always been a force to be reckoned with. I remember telling my USN boot camp company commander once, upon questioning, that I wasn’t afraid of her because she reminded me of my mother. It was the first time I saw my company commander smile and almost laugh.
My mother’s antics and advocacy often felt embarrassing as a young adult growing up. We’d laugh and blame on the Filipina fire yet there is no doubt her Cumbest lineage was also shining through. It carried on to my military career where her knowledgeable skills growing up as the daughter of sailors & rumored bank robbers resulted in a ship-to-shore phone call to my USN vessel in the middle of an actual war zone (I should have written & didn’t fail to do so again, lol). I learned a lot watching her grow and heal from the trauma of losing the love of her life and her commitment to him in raising his daughters with the pure love he knew she had in her, despite all odds. She did it. She’s wonderful, she’s mean too, and I am blessed to have her as my mother.
She’s 80 years young today and her life is filled with grandchildren, great-grandchildren and grand-dogs that she dotes on and who love her dearly. There’s also a new one on the way, scheduled to be born on her birthday this October 2!
I love you Mom! Thanks for loving me & for being you… perfectly you. Didi XOXO
Dorothy Meindok is the Veterans Consultant for The Post Newspaper. She served in the United States Navy and is currently a lawyer advocating for the rights of our nation’s veterans.
