By Brenda Groves
The Post Newspaper Contributing Writer
“Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and if I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.”
This is the earliest memory of a prayer that I can recall reciting. I tried to say it every night. Sometimes I would kneel by my bed, and other times I would not even make it to the word “sleep” before my head hit the pillow and I was out.
Over the years, my prayers changed quite a bit. They were not so rehearsed or formal. Talking to God was normal for me. I don’t remember Him speaking back to me, I just couldn’t recognize His voice. But I always felt like He was there. Nearby. So, I would talk to Him.
My prayers were often something along the lines of “God don’t let my sister find me under this bed, she’s really mad at me. And PLEASE don’t let that spider come near me.” Or “Thank you God for my Momma and Daddy.”
Other times they were simple request or questions. Lots of questions!
“God, I hope mom bought chocolate ice cream.”
“And God why did you make spiders anyway? You know I don’t like them.”
Many times, I would just share my thoughts with Him.
“I loved going to the Fair, God! Except for that one ride. It made me sick, but the rest were really good.
But as I grew older my prayers grew more selfish, and at times more serious.
“God, make this bed quit spinning and I’ll NEVER drink again.” “Lord, please don’t let me get caught and I promise I’ll never skip school again.” “I like ______, please make him like me back.” “And why can’t I have hair like Jacklyn Smith!!” “And freckles! What’s with all these freckles I have?”
Over the next decade (my twenties and early thirties), I still spoke to God, but it became fewer and far between. As my heart grew hardened through sin and the busyness of life, I became less sensitive to His nearness, and sadly I shut Him out of my life.
Then through a series of events at the age of 33, I gave my life to Christ (I got born again-John Chapter 3), and for the first time I heard the voice of my Heavenly Father in my heart speaking to me on a regular basis, especially after I received the Baptism of the Holy Spirit (with the evidence of speaking in tongues).
I got used to hearing His voice, through reading His word. Now, we began to have real conversations. Back and forth and all day, I was engaged. I chose to tune in and focus on knowing Jesus more and more and His will for my life.
The little child was back, learning and growing. But this time I was learning how-to walk-in freedom as a born-again child of God. I was praying for wisdom with understanding as I saw a parallel in God’s word between our earthly life and spiritual life. The two became one.
Something else happened, I realized I didn’t have to beg God to help me or anyone else. I didn’t have to “storm heaven” with my prayers and try to convince God to get involved.
I also heard someone once teach against using prayer as our Heavenly grocery store list. I had to think about this, because if I’m not attentive, my “prayer time” with God can be like taking a shopping cart down the aisles of Heaven. Just load up and leave.
Our loving Heavenly Father is a Person. Do not be afraid to share your heart with Him, instead of making it an opportunity for a gripe fest, or “gloom, despair and agony on me” time. (And I have done this so I’m not condemning anyone.)
Just talk to Him with respect, honesty, and hope in His word. There is a time for repentance, (recognizing the need to change, renew our minds and actions), but focusing on His goodness and acceptance of you because of your faith in His Son. “Accepted in the Beloved.”
You know as His word became reality in my heart. IT JUST CLICKED! It is His idea and good pleasure to give us good things and to supply our needs. We don’t have to badger Him, get His attention, remind Him, barter with Him, or persuade Him. Salvation for our families- HIS IDEA! Healing for our families- HIS IDEA! Marriages restored- HIS IDEA! To lead healthy and prosperous lives- ALL HIS IDEA!
(But His will in our lives does not automatically come to pass, without our consent and cooperation.)
How did I discover this? Again, I chose to put aside the teachings of men or even certain doctrines of my church upbringing that didn’t line up to the word of God and with God’s character.
I’m not trying to be critical here, and I might offend a lot of people but I’m speaking out of my heart. We have some pretty lame (and some demonically influenced) ideas about how we approach, pray, and interact with God.
If any of you have children, how do you relate or want to relate to them? Does your child have to beg you for food or clothes? Do they have to clean their room before you’ll give them medicine when they are sick? Do they have to earn your love in any way?
When you child speaks to you does their voice suddenly change and they become stiff and rigid, do they clasp their hands and repeat their words over and over? You would look at them like they are nuts? Do they chant or ramble on and on like you’re not even in the room?
I have a child. He’s grown now, and I know how I want him to respond to me. With respect and in a healthy and loving relationship, and with an open heart. Hopefully, he’ll feel confident enough to share what is on his heart without fear of rejection. I will offer wisdom, but I respect his freewill to accept or reject it.
When he was still at home, I wanted him to respect me, listen and hopefully be submissive to my leading.
As a grown man, I hope he is willing to yield his opinion and experiences to mine because he trusts in my love for him and that I only want the best for him.
God wants only the best for us. I will not lead my son into destruction but try to help him avoid it. If it’s unavoidable because of other people, then I’ll try to steer him through it.
But I am not God, so how much more is our HEAVENLY FATHER WILLING TO GIVE US GOOD THINGS IF WE ASK HIM? Trust that He is smart enough to know ahead of time what our needs are and learn how to receive and experience His love and the fruits from it.
My most precious gift from my Heavenly Father is His Son Jesus, and the Holy Spirit’s constant and active presence in my life. No matter what’s going on around me, my awareness of Him may vary but His faithfulness to honor His word will never fail.
“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” 1 Thes. 5:16-18
(Matt: 6:7, 7:11; Mark 13:33; Luke 11:13; John 16:26, 17:9, 17:15)
Contact Brenda Groves at: bkgroves1996@yahoo.com
