WHAT NOBODY TELLS YOU ABOUT GOING BACK TO SCHOOL AS A VETERAN

It wasn’t a knee-jerk
decision. I planned my
exit from the Navy well
in advance (and publicly
on Task & Purpose). I
wanted to go to the graduate
school of my choice
full-time on the timeline
that I dictated. Like many
others, I also wavered
about when I’d leave. After
deployment, I dropped
my papers to resign my
active duty commission
and started grad school
applications. I left active
duty two years ago, and in
May, I graduated from the
Fletcher School of Law
and Diplomacy at Tufts
University.
Conventional wisdom
about being a veteran in
school focuses on benefits
or jokes about being
an older student. And
most of it holds up, no
matter the kind of program,
whether you’re a
first-time, first-generation
college student, or getting
a Ph.D. But here’s what
nobody tells you:
I didn’t realize how
some of the worst days of
my service had profoundly
affected me until the
second semester of my
first year, when I started
white-knuckling the desk
in the back of the lecture
hall in one of my classes. I
didn’t serve in direct combat,
and the kinds of missions
I supported don’t
make the news unless
something goes horribly
wrong. I felt like I didn’t
deserve to feel the anxiety
that lived in my bones.
It took interviewing hundreds
of women veterans
for my thesis, including a
handful who had a similar
military experience to me
decades earlier, to realize
that we were struggling
with some of the same issues
and that was okay.
Self-advocacy is exhausting
and choosing
expediency may be the
best thing for your selfcare,
even if it impacts
your grades. Chronic pain
is a rude roommate who
does not care when you
have midterms. At times,
getting an extension so I
could get through a flare
was a godsend. At other
times, I took B’s on some
papers in my last semester
that I could have gotten
A’s on because I decided
being done was better for
my health and self-care.
As veterans, we often
complain that the civilian
world doesn’t know or
care enough about us. If
we are not part of the conversation,
it will take place
behind our backs or not at
all. In academia, we can
spearhead the research
that informs the public and
shapes policy.
Seek social experiences
that make you uncomfortable.
I met some my best
friends in graduate school
in an a capella group, and
through a recurring happy
hour the veterans club had
with former Peace Corps
volunteers (we called it
“War & Peace.”)
Where you go to school
really matters
Going back to school
directly after the military
gave me the opportunity to reflect in a way
that I would not have known I needed had
I gone straight to work. My courses taught
me a vocabulary that helped frame past
experiences and gave me tools to accomplish
more than I could have imagined. I
had time to network, work a summer internship
at a top company, and figure out
what I didn’t want to do.
Don’t rush. If you’re on unsure footing
on your path, take the time to conduct research
and spend some time in community
college. Seek support from Service
to School, Warrior-Scholar Project, and
Posse Foundation Veterans Program. Aim
high, and you may end up somewhere that
changes the trajectory of your life.